One Heart, One Mind!

Life has way of calling one to change and grow; this never ceases to amaze me.  This past weekend was Central’s Kairos (word means a time when the conditions are right for the accomplishment of a crucial action) Retreat.  This retreat is designed for our Senior division.  The ultimate goal of the retreat is to call all back to God.  A series of talks are given and through the witness of the speakers and the conversation that follows, all experience God.   I happen to know this class well as I’ve taught them for two academic years.  They have a reputation for being a rowdy and rambunctious class.  This retreat, however, proved to be a time of introspection and conversion (based on my observation) for many of them.  It compelled me to do some soul-searching myself; one cannot experience something like this and not be moved.

On the last night, I was leading my group in a closing session, “affirmation.”  It was here I received, simultaneously, a great compliment and critique from a wise student.  He told me I was one of the greatest teachers he’s ever known and he has the utmost respect for me.  He went on to say, though, that he was disappointed in some of the destructive choices I’ve made.  He believed that I could do better.  Wow!  No student had ever put it so poignantly and direct.  His words struck me like a 2x4 across the face.  For a moment, I felt like a father who, unaware of the influence he wields, did something terrible to offend his son.  The student was afraid to share because he thought I would be offended.  In response, I expressed my pride in his ability to speak his truth with love.  I went on to say that I was sorry for not being the best role-model.  This apology, however, is in vain if I choose to continue to live the same way. 

Earlier in the day, I shared my personal story of obstacles faced in my short 30 years of life on this earth.  I spoke earnestly and respectfully (of myself and to the students) of destructive decisions I’ve made regarding alcohol and sex.  These issues have caused harm and pain to many others as well as myself.  I attributed these regrettable actions to boredom and loneliness.  These actions are evidence of the fact that, in a way, I live two lives.  I have my life as an educator and role-model and I have a life outside the school.  Of course it is ok to have a life outside school, in fact, it is a necessity.  Why, though, must there be no transparency in how I live my life off campus?  Why can’t I live the message of the material I teach?  What inhibits me from conversion and change?  Indeed, the spiritual life is rife with failure, boredom, mystery, and loneliness.  Many a spiritual masters have referred to these instances or periods of life as “dark nights of the soul.”

When I do experience these “dark nights” then I’m glad to be part of Sobremesa.  Community reminds that no one is an island existing totally alone.  If individualism and the “American Way” of doing things ultimately causes boredom, loneliness, or dis-ease with oneself, then Community is the cure.  Community calls me to pray with God who proves that none are alone.  Because of community, I’m reminded that I need to live one life not two.  I need to be transparent so that I can live my vocation better and work to effect positive change in the world.  I need to be the best man I can be. 

If we are, in deed, about making the world a better place then we must be of one heart and one mind; we must be in community.  This insight reminds me of a line from Acts 4:32, “The whole congregation of believers was united as one—one heart, one mind (http://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=acts%204:32&version=MSG)!  Today, I’m giving thanks for my vocation and my life in community.  These realities are like a spring of wisdom and inspiration in my life!  I challenge you to examine how community is something that you need in this very private and individual culture we live in.  If you are interested in continuing the conversation then please email us at sobremesamlc@gmail.com.

The Adventure Continues

Sobremesa has been blessed with so many things and people... There are times when I just sit back (in AWE) and breath in the Good News. It's amazing. I liken it to times when I have been filled with pride and love for my family and their accomplishments (my sister and her wedding, my cousin getting into Penn State and on and on). Louie achieved the Marianist Heritage Award at Central Catholic on Friday. I was blessed to attend the Chaminade Day mass with his family and the Central Catholic Community. It was a special mass to attend as I was yet again surrounded with Marianists...both vowed and lay Marianists. To top it off... to have Louie receive the award and speak was an inspiring thing. He truly does live out the Marianist Charism in such an intentional way. I am thankful to have him as my community mate, challenging me to live in the same manner and supporting me as we bring our community to the greater community. It's awesome. Congratulations Louie.
The past two Fridays have been filled with interviews from Chaminade College Preparatory West Hills Middle School. My friend, Kate, teaches religion there and "brought me in" via skype to share what it is like to be Lay Marianist and to live in community. Although I have opportunities to talk about community and live out the Charism... our interviews excited me. They reminded me of the opportunity and gift community is.... and helped change my perspective on the changes Sobremesa is experiencing. There are other things that have helped change my perspective: talking to Louie EXTENSIVELY, talking with Bro. Mike (our Spiritual Guide/Companion on the Journey), praying, and seeing Jhonny and Clare together. It is sad to see Clare go. But it is beautiful to see her love Jhonny, to see her in love with her new community. I pray that Clare feels our support and love for her and Jhonny.
The students reminded me that both Louie and I chose to do this every day. That we both struggle with accommodating each other and living with radical hospitality towards not only ourselves, but our greater community. They challenged me to think about the challenge it is to be Lay Marianist... the responsibility/call to serve others. To think about how Sobremesa has a blank canvas... what are we going to do with it. What i give up by saying YES to community and Sobremesa. They reminded me that Sobremesa does not exist only within the house at Norman Lane... but within the greater Marianist world... and San Antonio world. It only exists because of the continued support of our friends and family.... YOU!!!
Both Louie and I have come to the conclusion that there is so much more for us here within Sobremesa. The call is here.... and now.... and I think we are both feeling the Spirit.
Last week, Louie eluded to the call to community... and if that was something you would/could be called to. If that is the case, we want to talk to you! Email us (sobremesamlc@gmail.com), call us, post a comment. We want to start the conversation, continue the conversation.

Take Courage

“Take courage, it is I, do not be afraid.”

One could spend their life living in a perpetual state of fear and darkness, or one could take courage and trust in God’s grace and spirit.  I firmly believe that our fledgling community, Sobremesa, is at a crossroads of sorts.  Where do we go from here?  Should we fold the towel and close the doors while we’re still ahead?  Should we continue on this journey?  These are the questions we face as members of an intentional community in 21^st century and they are not exactly comforting questions.

It is always bittersweet to see someone depart community. Regardless of why that person left, the transition is tough.  Clare has been with the community since August 2011 and I am used to her being around, so it hard to see her go.

Putting the three of us under one roof proved to be a difficult challenge.  There were many times we wondered how we best could work together because of our different personalities.  In the final analysis, it is apparent that somewhere along our collective journey, communication broke down; a hard reality to face and admit!  Because of this break down we lost a member.

It should be said that I’m glad to know that Clare can live with her truth: that Sobremesa wasn’t something that was bringing out her truest most authentic self.  For one to acknowledge that requires extreme courage and radical honesty.  Indeed the community will miss you Clare!

Today, with one less person in our community we are in the midst of serious inner work and honest conversation.  Why do we exist?  As mentioned above, should we simply throw the towel in?  Why should we continue?  Where are we individually and personally in our commitment to the mission and the vision of this community?

Despite the grief that the community feels, we enter this luminal space with confidence.  This whole intentional community thing is not for the faint hearted.  I suppose many around us may indeed suggest for us to throw in the towel and enjoy life without a commitment to community.  I cannot just throw in the towel, though.  In fact, we are actively seeking new members.  Would participating in the life of this community (you don’t have to live here to be a member) be something that interests you? 

If the answer is yes please take courage and trust that God is calling you to community.  I fear that too many of us have been led to believe that community is a waste of time or too difficult to bring to fruition. We live in a society, generally speaking, that doesn’t value the common life.  Here, in the mecca of individualism, the USA, we remain firmly rooted in God’s Spirit as we continue our shared life, aka Sobremesa. It will be challenge but I’m here to say that will continue to put forth the courage to see how God is calling the community.  I trust Jesus when he says in Mark 6:50, “Take courage, it is I, do not be afraid.”